{"id":5211,"date":"2021-11-26T11:23:37","date_gmt":"2021-11-26T11:23:37","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.africa-press.net\/rwanda\/all-news\/it-matters-how-you-ask-for-help"},"modified":"2021-11-26T12:16:32","modified_gmt":"2021-11-26T12:16:32","slug":"it-matters-how-you-ask-for-help","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.africa-press.net\/rwanda\/all-news\/it-matters-how-you-ask-for-help","title":{"rendered":"It matters how you ask for help"},"content":{"rendered":"

Africa-Press – Rwanda. <\/strong><\/span>Everyone at some point needs help, it’s normal. However, sometimes we shun asking for it for fear of judgment, disappointment, or just to prove that we are strong enough to have it all together.<\/p>\n

I personally used to fear asking for help as I detested coming off as vulnerable. But with time, I have observed that there are people willing to support, if you just open up about your need. Good people still exist.<\/p>\n

You may be astonished that some people may not have a particular solution that you need, but may refer you to a person that can actually assist. A few steps can help you out while pondering on who and how to ask for help;<\/p>\n

Be polite<\/b><\/p>\n

Whether someone is so close to you, for example, a partner, friend, or relative, show politeness while requesting for any assistance. One shouldn\u2019t assume that it is a must to be offered help. The tone and approach you use matter.<\/p>\n

You may actually find yourself infuriated at someone because somehow you raised your hopes so high, but were unfortunately let down and deep down you think that the person may have failed to help you on purpose, which is wrong.<\/p>\n

We ought to learn to respect people\u2019s decisions, if someone isn\u2019t in a position to help, appreciate them, they have their reasons and that shouldn\u2019t blow your friendship with them. Sorry but move on.<\/p>\n

Who knows, perhaps they may help next time. I have seen people holding grudges because they expected assistance, but didn\u2019t get it. Others actually revenge. Life is too short to play such games.<\/p>\n

Know who to ask<\/b><\/p>\n

The common problem I have experienced is thinking that the people close to me are the ones that I should approach first in case of an emergency, but it mustn\u2019t be the case. Sometimes we need to talk to people that are not even close to us as long as they have the services we need.<\/p>\n

Take an example, if you\u2019re undergoing stress, it\u2019s easy to open up to a friend, who may provide a listening ear but may not know how to help, either because they haven\u2019t been in your situation before or they\u2019re not experts. Then that means you need a counsellor.<\/p>\n

Well, if it\u2019s a job opportunity or connection, then search for someone in your domain or a person with connections. You may be amazed at how a stranger can save you. Knowing who can help you before asking saves you time and disappointment.<\/p>\n

Be specific, some details won\u2019t hurt<\/b><\/p>\n

If you are asking for financial help, it could be a loan. Be direct with how much you need, don\u2019t just go with \u2018any amount you can suffice.\u2019 This seems sketchy and may not show the urgency for which you need help. It\u2019s okay to offer someone some details, not so much, but at least explain to them so that they know how to help. For instance, let someone know exactly what you want, if it’s money, how much, and when exactly you need it, if possible specify what it is needed for.<\/p>\n

Some people may be able to help if given enough time. If they expect to receive money from somewhere, let\u2019s say in a weeks\u2019 time and your deadline is in two weeks\u2019 time, then you have their help.<\/p>\n

Give feedback<\/b><\/p>\n

People actually love to know that their support was helpful. It\u2019s not a must, but it is a kind gesture to inform the person that helped you, if their help resulted in success. Whether it is an exam that someone discussed for you and you excelled, a connection that turned to a job opportunity, or marriage counselling that stopped your divorce process and instead fixed your relationship, share the outcome.<\/p>\n

Offer help to others<\/b><\/p>\n

Just like the common proverb \u201cOne good turn deserves another,\u201d If you\u2019re the kind of person that usually stretches a helping hand to others, it\u2019s easy for people to pay back when you\u2019re in need.<\/p>\n

For More News And Analysis About Rwanda<\/a> Follow Africa-Press<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Africa-Press – Rwanda. Everyone at some point needs help, it’s normal. However, sometimes we shun asking for it for fear of judgment, disappointment, or just to prove that we are strong enough to have it all together. I personally used to fear asking for help as I detested coming off as vulnerable. But with time, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":84,"featured_media":5210,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[24,28,31],"tags":[760,763,3027,3028,758],"class_list":["post-5211","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-all-news","category-homepage-english","category-miscellaneous","tag-africa-press","tag-africa-press-rwanda","tag-for-help","tag-matters","tag-rwanda"],"yoast_head":"\nIt matters how you ask for help - Rwanda<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Everyone at some point needs help, it's normal. 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