Africa-Press – Eswatini. The weekend primary elections results were quite the spectacle! It was like watching a reality TV show, complete with drama and mini coups. Talk about keeping us on the edge of our seats! These results gave us a mixed bag of indicators, leaving us scratching our heads about who and what people really want for this country. It’s like trying to solve a riddle wrapped in an enigma.
If I were a fortune teller, I’d be face-palming right now for placing my bets on outgoing Ndzingeni Member of Parliament (MP) Lutfo Dlamini as the sure-fire winner of the primary elections. It turns out my crystal ball needs a serious upgrade because, apparently, doing more than your average MP for your constituency doesn’t guarantee victory. Who knew? Then there was Pigg’s Peak. My poor little heart would have done some serious gymnastics if I had to witness the incredible spectacle of its MP Jabulani ‘Buy Cash’ Mabuza being pushed and shoved all the way to a nail-biting nine vote victory. Talk about a close call!
But that’s what elections are all about – the thrilling spectacle of grown adults arguing like toddlers over who gets to sit in the big fancy chair and make important decisions while the rest of us watch with a mix of amusement and despair. Our voter demands and expectations are like a funhouse mirror, where politicians receive their performance assessment. Congratulations to all those who made it through to the next round and hard luck to those who gained valuable experience of how to do better in five years time.
What I always find intriguing about the Eswatini electorate is their knack for keeping us on our toes. Unpredictability is their middle name, and they wear it proudly. Some of these folks can ‘kill you with a smile’! How else do you explain candidates who get only two votes? Talk about a plot twist! Where are all their supporters? Did they take a wrong turn at the voting booth? Did they accidentally vote for the wrong candidate? And what about their family, relatives and friends? Did they all suddenly develop amnesia and forgot to show up? Comedian S’lwane absolutely nailed it with his hilarious portrayal of a dejected candidate.
It may not go down well with the losers, but hey, that’s just how the cookie crumbles in the wacky world of politics! You enter the race with the hopes of either becoming a champion or experiencing the crushing defeat that will haunt your dreams for eternity. The results also reveal that in certain regions, it wasn’t just about what the MP accomplished for you, but rather about giving others a shot at enjoying the perks (‘kuyokudla’) instead of focusing on the MP’s actual performance. Afterall, who needs results when you can have a buffet?
The legendary Motshane MP, Robert Magongo, who was defeated by a businessman in a battle of epic proportions, has shared how some folks believed he had finally reached the pinnacle of wealth and success. They thought, ‘Sowudlile’ (he has surely amassed a fortune beyond measure). He also complained about his constituents playing hide-and-seek with him during election time instead of giving him a daily report card on his performance. I mean, really?
Another MP, Vulimpompi Nhleko of Nkwene, boasted about his impressive ability to bring water and sanitation projects, as well as his unparalleled talent for developing sports programmes for the youth. Apparently he believed that these extraordinary feats were reason enough for the voters to worship him and catapult him back into Parliament. This begs the question; were our perplexed MPs caught in a delightful dance of disconnection with the common folk? Seems like it!
A gentle reminder to our future politicians: Beware of the perils of parliamentary distancing! The electorate has an expectation beyond legislating. But who else is to blame for this but the candidates themselves? The attitude has always been ‘who needs policies and ideas when you can just bribe people with cash and groceries’?
In another episode, it seems like textile workers decided to crash the primary elections party for some MPs. Outgoing Mtfongwaneni MP Roy Fanourakis is convinced that he became the unfortunate victim of this peculiar practice because of unfamiliar faces in his area on election day. Were they really strangers or forgotten voters? Only he knows.
Meanwhile, Kwaluseni MP Mabhanisi Dlamini has some serious questions about the vote counting exercise among inmates. Apparently, he only managed to secure five prisoner votes, even though his area is home to over 40 inmates. He should never trust criminals again. He has gone ahead and filed an official complaint though, claiming that the Elections and Boundaries Commission (EBC) conveniently forgot to present the special voting results to the polling sites. But such is the spectacle of our elections process.
As the EBC tackles these and other concerns, they should also work their magic on the annoying glitches and inconsistent vote tallying procedures at the polling stations. We don’t want the show to be spoiled by technical difficulties, do we? Let’s keep it entertaining and glitch-free because, when it comes to legitimising a new government and earning the faith of the voters, election integrity and fairness are as non-negotiable as a toddler’s bedtime.
Source: TIMES
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