Africa-Press – Lesotho. Toxic masculinity is tricky. It is a phrase that – Misunderstood- can seem wildly insulting, even bigoted. Because the term requires careful contexualization and provokes such strong reaction, our impulse may be to avoid discussing it.
Before we can engage in conversations about “ Masculinity” or “Femininity”, toxic or otherwise, we should begin with a few key ideas about gender. Research has shown that there is very little difference between the brains of men and women.
While gender identity is a deeply held feeling of being male, female or even X- Gender, people of different genders tend to act differently not because of biological characteristics but because of rigid societal norms created around genders Laying this groundwork requires effort, the term provides a useful tool for engaging with society.
The phrase is derived from studies that focus on violent behavior perpetrated by man, and is designed to describe not masculinity itself, buy the form of genderised behavior that results when expectations of what it means to be a man go wrong
The Good Man Project defines it in this way- “ Toxic masculinity is a narrow and repressive description of manhood as defined by violence, sex, status privilege and and aggression.
It’s the cultural idea of manliness where strength is everything while emotions are a weaknes; Where sex and brutality are yardsticks by which men are measured while supposedly “feminine” traits, which can range from emotional vulnerability to simply not being hypersexual are the means by which your status as a man can be taken away
Discussing toxic masculinity is not saying men are bad or evil, and the tem is NOT an assertion that men are inherently violent. But in a culture but in a culture that equates masculinity with physical power, some men and boys will invariably feel they are failing at being a man.
For these particular men and boys, toxic masculinity has created has created a vacuum in their lives that can be filled with violence. ; Through the abuse of women and children in their care.
The stakes of this conversation are high. We can perhaps spare boys from thinking there is only one way to being a man. We give them space to express their gender in ways that feel authentic and safe for themselves. We are doing so out of love for the boys and men in our lives, also protecting the women and girl child in our homes and society.
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